Defending the Raven

Bisexual. Married. Man. Open. Read On.

Sexual Self

Viviane first linked to this article earlier this week. I read the first sentence and it was a slap in the face because it’s something I’ve said before, and something that I’ve never been able to do. I wanted to share the first two paragraphs for the group. I’m not gonna comment any further at this point, but hope you all do.

Many of us tend to compartmentalize our sexual selves. We not only remove sex from the rest of our identity (so sex becomes merely a thing we do, not all the things we are) but we also draw artificial boundaries around our sexual desires. We deny long held sexual fantasies, we act in certain ways because it is what we think is expected of us based on our gender, or our age.

But sexuality is who we are, and no matter how hard we try to deny sexual aspects of ourselves we might consider embarrassing or unseemly, sexuality is one of the life forces that touches all aspects of who we are; our mind, our body and our spirit.



February 17, 2006 - Posted by | Uncategorized


  1. If you posted this earlier, I could have saved a lot of writing. I think I can do a series of posts on “no matter how hard we try to deny…” insofar as I have devoted the last seven days of my life to trying, without much success I would add. The amazing thing to me is how over a very long time period I denied so well.

    Comment by Bibydays | February 17, 2006 | Reply

  2. Well, gosh I’m sorry. I meant to, but just got to it today! But I know for me sometimes I need to get it out myself in my own words for it all to sink in.

    Comment by Raven in NYC (aka Mark) | February 17, 2006 | Reply

  3. What an interesting read. Thanks for the post. 🙂

    Comment by David Quinn | February 20, 2006 | Reply

  4. Good blog. Yeah what you’re sensing is what’s happening, gotta accept it as part of your identity. Totally agree. Not easy to do for many – witness the repression of recent decades.

    Comment by pawlr | February 27, 2006 | Reply

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